


and bound to your tears

by orsumfenix



Category: Ao no Exorcist | Blue Exorcist
Genre: Crying, Friendship, Gen, Side Effects
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:27:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28435359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orsumfenix/pseuds/orsumfenix
Summary: “How would you know?”“Because you’ve been crying for a week.”“I’m not crying,” Renzou says, right as twin tears trail down his cheeks.
Relationships: Moriyama Shiemi & Shima Renzou, Shima Renzou & Suguro "Bon" Ryuuji
Comments: 4
Kudos: 27





	and bound to your tears

**Author's Note:**

> have a few renzou drabbles floating about so i figured i might fuck around and post a few ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

It’s the middle of summer and Renzou has been crying for a week.

It’s not like he wants to. Strangely enough, he doesn’t enjoy constantly sniffling and rubbing at his face and being dehydrated as hell. His eyes hurt. The only positive is that red eyes actually look pretty good on him. Match the hair.

“You need to drink water,” Bon commands, holding out a bottle like it’s the holy grail. “You’re dehydrated.”

“How would you know?”

“Because you’ve been crying for a week.”

“I’m not crying,” Renzou says, right as twin tears trail down his cheeks. “I’m not upset. I told you, Yamantaka did this.”

“I know you’re not upset,” Bon says, not sounding sure. “But you’re losing a lot of water and not doing much to replace it. You need to drink something.”

“Aw, are you worried about me?”

“Fuck off.”

Renzou smiles down at the table. Some absolute sprinter of a tear made it down his neck and now his collarbone’s wet. Could be worse. Every morning he wakes up to a puddle under his face. He’s gone through three pillows in seven days.

Bon isn’t shifting.

“Isn’t your arm tired?”

“Yeah,” Bon says, “so take the damn water.” 

“Ew, water’s so boring. What about Fanta, I’ll have Fanta.”

“There is no Fanta, genius. And sugar isn’t good for you.”

“It is in small doses.”

“Yeah, and Fanta’s a big dose. If you don’t take this water I’ll stick it down your throat.”

Renzou widens his eyes. “You’d attack a crying man? I thought better of you, Bon, I really did.” But he must be losing his touch, because he takes the water and Bon doesn’t even get mad. What has this world come to?

When Renzou wipes his face it comes away soaking. Bon watches with a weird look.

“I’ll get you some tissues,” Bon says. It is much appreciated.

\--

It’s like, there are things familiars can do, right? They can interact with Tamers in all kinds of ways. Mostly insignificant ways, but it’s possible. Other objects are where familiars have to use the Tamer as a channel.

Renzou was never a great Tamer for Yamantaka. For one thing, he almost never used him. For another, Renzou keeps his emotions to himself. He’s not like the other Shima men, he doesn’t get riled up, doesn’t channel his anger for a fight. Doesn’t let his feelings feed into the use of Yamantaka’s power.

In a bid to get used more, Yamantaka did this _thing._ Pushing bad feelings to the forefront might not turn out that bad for most people, but Shima Renzou is not most people. And when feelings have been bottled up and pushed down and packed away for years…Well. They can explode quite spectacularly. 

“I made you some tea,” Shiemi says, cradling the cup in her hands. “My grandmother taught me how. There are special herbs in it to help you relax, then maybe you can cheer up a little.”

“I’m not actually sad,” Renzou says for the sixty-eighth time this week, forcing a huge smile so she can see how Not Actually Sad he is. “I feel like I’m gonna get tears in that and I don’t wanna spoil it.”

“Tea has water in it anyway.”

“Yeah, but I’m talking about tears. Tears are salty.”

Shiemi politely but firmly gives him the tea. What is it with everyone forcing him to drink stuff? Everyone’s acting kind of weird about the whole thing but Shiemi’s definitely been the sweetest and the gentlest and so also the hardest one to handle. She thinks he’s actually sad. Wait, back up, rewind. She thinks he’s Actually Sad. Okay. Better.

“When I’m upset I like to watch old films,” Shiemi tells him. It’s been a week of advice on how to cheer up. “Maybe we could watch some together?”

“Well, I’m never gonna say no to hanging out with a cute girl.”

“I could invite Izumo,” Shiemi offers. Izumo is also very cute and Renzou would like to see her, but her reaction to this crying thing is something he wants to avoid. Her and Paku are the only ones who haven’t seen him yet and this shit’s embarrassing, yo. It must remain hidden from everyone it can be hidden from. “Or everyone else, we could make it a group thing. I like to be with my friends when I’m sad.”

Ah, sweet Shiemi, everyone deals with sadness differently. Some people hide, some people wallow, and some people, well. Some people don’t deal with it at all.

The movie Shiemi puts on is so goddamn boring but she’s cute enough that it doesn’t matter. It is also a quiet film, meaning his sniffles are filling the room even more than usual. Shiemi keeps looking at him all concerned, like he’s about to have a mental breakdown at any second or is maybe already having one, and his smiles are getting tiring. His cheeks hurt.

He’s taken to carrying a handkerchief with him so there won’t be as many tissues littering the place up. At first he tried keeping it in his sleeve but then he felt like an old granny, so now it lives in his pocket. Shiemi watches him pull it out and offers to embroider his name into it. What is this, a regency costume drama? It’s a glorified napkin.

“Sure,” Renzou agrees, passing it over. Might be an error. He needs to stock up on tissues, stat. “You know the kanji, right?”

“I think so. If you write it down I can make sure I don’t get it wrong.”

“I’m sure you wouldn’t, you’re really smart. Hey, wait a sec, do you know any plants or anything that would get me to stop crying?”

“You mean to cheer you up?”

“To stop Yamantaka’s weird spell thing.”

“Oh,” Shiemi says, twirling a strand of her hair. “Ryuji-san said your familiar only did…whatever he did the once and this is just what’s left over.”

Goddamn Bon. Has to go and be right and tell everyone the truth before Renzou gets the chance to lie.

“It’s because of the spell,” Renzou says. “Actually, it wasn’t even a spell, but I can’t think of a better name for it. It’s just a thing some familiars can do. But you shouldn’t worry, your little green man probably can’t do it.”

“I wasn’t worried,” Shiemi says, “because he would never want me to be upset.”

This is starting to get uncomfortable. Shiemi’s twisting the handkerchief in her hands. That thing must be at least soggy and at worst soaking, how was he stupid enough to give it over? Oh, right. Because a girl asked.

Renzou waves an arm.

“Nah, nah, it’s not like that. He didn’t want me to be upset! He got it wrong, he was trying to do something else.”

“What was he trying to do?”

“Y’know, if you wanted to play 20 Questions, you could’ve just asked.”

“Sorry.” Shiemi bows her head. Great, now he feels like shit. “I’m just worried. You’re crying a lot for someone who says he isn’t sad.”

“I’m not sad, though. Like, really not sad. I don’t get sad. There’s not even anything to make me sad.” He pauses. “Except for when Izumo-chan ignores me. Actually, maybe that’s what this is. All my sadness at rejection.”

Shiemi stares at the floor.

“I can tell when you’re lying, you know,” she says softly. Renzou’s blood seems to halt. He doesn’t even know what to say. He just stares. “Not always, but right now it’s easy. Because your body’s telling the truth.”

“Deep, huh?”

“Not deep,” Shiemi says. “Just honest. I need until tomorrow to sew your name on this, will you be okay without one until then?”

On the screen the film’s credits roll. Renzou didn’t even notice it end.

“Shiemi,” he says, ignoring the fresh wave of tears rolling down his face. “I’m always okay.”

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading!! :)


End file.
